Twilight Galaxy by Metric

Did they tell you, you should grow up
When you wanted to dream.
Did they warn you, better shape up
If you want to succeed
I don't know about you, who are they talking to?
They aren't talking to me.

I'm higher than high
Lower than deep,
I'm doing it wrong
And singing along

Go higher than high, lower than deep
Keep doing it wrong and singing along

Did i ask you for attention
When affection is what i need
Thinking sorrow is perfection,
I'd wallow 'til you told me
There's no glitter in the gutter,
There's no twilight galaxy.

Go higher than high, ooo
Lower than deep, ooo
Keep doing it wrong, ooo
Singing along, ooo

I'm higher than high, ooo
Lower than deep, ooo
Doing it wrong, ooo
And singing along, ooo

I'm alright, c'mon baby
I've seen all the demons that you've got.
If you're not alright, now c'mon baby
I'll pick you up and take you where you want
Anywhere you want
Anywhere you want
Anywhere you want
Anything you want

I'm higher than high, ooo
Lower than deep, ooo
Doing it wrong, ooo
And singing along, ooo

Higher than high, ooo
Lower than deep, ooo
Doing it wrong, ooo
Singing along, ooo

well.

I now truly know what it feels like to swallow your pride.

ouch, it hurts.

ramble on.

SO, I don't work at Starbucks anymore! I quit June 28th of this year, that was the best day of my life. Knowing that I will never have to go there and be treated like shit every day was a weight of my shoulders. I don't have to fake being nice to uppity rich Baxter people anymore, or bust my ass while half of the other Baristas didn't pull their weight. I'm so glad that chapter in my life is CLOSED.

But, I just can't not work right? I haven't since I quit, I feel like a terrible wife. I don't want to go back to a place like that ever again and be MISERABLE every day. It wasn't worth the money I made.

I think I've found a good career, cosmetology. My younger sister already goes there, and loves it. I am going to a meeting next Thursday and talking with them about getting started. I hate change though, it has always scared me, but I need change. I need something fun and exciting and plus, I can't look the way I want for the most part. That's why I have purple hair now haha, nah. I'm ready, but nervous.

something unrelated?

I was just reading my Aunt's blog on how she likes to think that Granny is still here with us. Well, I've only said this to a few people, I know she is. I walked into our apartment a few months ago and I could.... smell her. It was almost overwhelming. I walked around the whole apartment while my husband Jarrod looked at me like I was insane. He asked. 'what are you looking for?' I look at him as tears filled my eyes and said, 'I smell Granny, like she's in this apartment, I was trying to look for her.'

On another occasion, I was lying in bed and again, I could smell her. I know she is watching over us.

I'm going to use this more...

I am going to try and use this more often, maybe mainly for my makeup. I've been really getting into makeup lately and would love to start doing tutorials. I can't do video ones yet, but maybe just picture tuts to begin with.

But, I have to go to work now :(.

My mom told me tonight that they are not thinking Granny will make it to the end of August. The cancer is starting to really affect her brain, she's forgetting people and that kind of stuff.

Mom also told me that I should go shopping for an outfit to wear for her funeral. They're making the funeral arrangements Monday.

We were talking about her possessions and what maybe we wanted. I told my mom to PLEASE please please save her perfume/perfume bottles for me. When me and my sister were little we'd always play with them when we went over there, haha and she always yell at us to stop messin' with her things <3. It may be weird, but I really want them. And she collects angels and I want one of them.

It's happening so fast. I'm not ready.

Things are.....

Things have been rough lately. My aunt is fortunately out of the hospital and back home :). My uncle on the other hand, is still far from well. They thought he wasn't going to make it as a matter of fact. But, he has shown signs of improvement, moving, reacting to people talking to him, he cried, and even sort of talked to my aunt. All that is awesome, he still just has a long way to go....

My grandmother also has cancer. It started in her kidneys and she had a tumor in her neck. They, like my uncle, thought she had maybe 6 months to live. Thank God, the cancer doctor gave us a better prognosis, she has years. Still, she is fighting cancer, but we'll have her with us longer than was first thought. I got a tattoo on my wrist dedicated to her <3.